The physics of change

I really don’t know much about physics – I think I just feel smart when I use the word. I’m not sure if physics has any connection to what I have in mind , but here it is: Changing a habit or a way of being is so slow, so hard to do, takes such attention and above all, persistence. You just have to keep chipping away at it. I have been overweight for I don’t know how many years. It depends on how overweight we’re talking. I thought I was overweight for a long time, when I weighed far less than I will ever be again. So, my point is that for years I have indulged my every whim, and now I am trying to instill some reason and it is so up and down. Three steps forward and two steps back. I think inertia has a part in it. You go in one direction for so long that it is hard to stop and change the direction of the motion. (Physics, see?) I lose less than a pound a week, which is fine as long as I go in that direction. The thing is, sometimes I just crave (and I mean CRAVE) the wrong food. Sweet, salty, greasy. No carrots, thank you. Nothing reasonable appeals to me. I am trying to learn to consider what I probably need nutritionally that is causing the cravings. Do I need protein? Am I thirsty but don’t recognize it? To a good eater who has led a reasonably balanced life those may sound like silly questions, but for me they are real. So my best bet at this point is to get the stuff I don’t want to eat out of my house so I don’t have to rely on being responsible, remembering my big picture goal.

Which is…well, in the short run that someone who doesn’t know (and so is being polite) that I am on WW notices that I have lost weight. I don’t know why I care what others think. I don’t actually, I just want some validation from outside myself. I know that my skinniest jeans (Really NOT skinny at all, but for me.) are very loose now, but I wonder if maybe they always fit like this and I just forget. Or if they are stretched out now.

Anyway, I have mde some healthy changes I think. Let’s see: Green drinks in the morning (now with ground flax seed. Ick.), drinking more water, eating more fruit and vegies, no Ben & Jerry’s for almost three months, eating plain yogurt n the morning, walking places rather than driving, and only about three small lowfat lattes a week. And no Ben & Jerry’s. I don’t miss it. Really.

It’s physics, simply physics.

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